I haven’t always been naturally happy. A few months ago I was writing in my journal and the first words that came out were “I feel lost.” I couldn’t figure out what else to write and for some reason I started to flip through the pages into past things that I had written. I flipped back to the first entry that I had written, about 6 months prior and I almost burst out into tears when I read the first sentence.
“I feel lost.”
This made me devastated. My initial thought was “Wtf! How long am I going to feel lost for? How much longer of this do I have?”
So I decided to take matters into my own hands and make a conscious decision to make myself happier. I wish I could say that I was some kind of genius that walked away from that decision happy as a clam but it took another 2 months before I could genuinely say “I am happy.”
What changed from me feeling lost to me being happy ninety nine percent of the time?